Local

Horizon Science Academy students are so dumb that three overdosed on blood pressure medicine. Another tremendous failure of government schools and the war on drugs. Apparently they took over the counter cold medicine. In Dayton, morons get to special treatment and go to special schools.

Police are inspecting people's homes to determine if they're safe for children. You have to be kidding me.

Water main break closes Main Street.

The bomb squad scrambles again.